I’m pretty sure when my parents taught me as a young child to apologize, they didn’t mean for me to say sorry for everything I do in my life.
I apologize all the time.
Maybe a million times a day.
Sorry to inconvenience you. Sorry that I had to change something. Sorry you might have misunderstood. Sorry I said that. Sorry I didn’t know. Sorry I’m still learning. Sorry that things didn’t happen as planned. Sorry I took your spot. Sorry that I had to make a decision. Sorry I made a mistake. Sorry I’m bad at math. Sorry for breathing so loud. Sorry that my shoes squeak. Sorry I ate the last cookie. Sorry I shrunk your shirt. Sorry dinner was terrible. Sorry I took money from your pants.
I even say sorry to doors, when I walk into them.
Doors don’t have feelings.
I’m just always sorry.
Don’t get me wrong. There are definitely times when an apology is warranted. Sometimes I’m not kind to my husband and I need to ask for forgiveness. I’ve definitely yelled at my kids, and was in the wrong and had to own up to my mistakes. Been careless with my words and hurt someone I care about. Done the wrong thing. Made a bad choice. In all of these situations I have genuinely been sorry, and it has been important to acknowledge and make things right. (which I think is what my parents meant.)
But most of the time as I throw my “sorry” around like confetti, I’m really just apologizing for being me.
I was thinking this week, after a sorry marathon – that maybe it’s time to stop being sorry for who I am.
That’s a radical thought for all of us.
Imagine walking into all that you are. Imperfect and flawed, but no more apologies. Instead, embracing what makes you the person that you have been created to be.
Stop saying sorry.
You don’t have to apologize.
You don’t need an excuse for being you.
I’ve spent a good amount of time in life worried about things I have said. Cared too much about what people think, and wondered obsessively if I have made the right choices. And while I’m certain I haven’t gotten everything right all the time, I’ve started to imagine myself walking forth in confidence in who I am, who I have been created to be and what I have been called to do. This sounds way more like the wonderfully un-apologetic life that I want to lead.
So, I’m going to stop saying sorry.
Not to people that I genuinely need to ask forgiveness from, because that’s important.
No one likes a jerk.
But I’m going to stop apologizing for being me.
I’m not sorry for who I am.
I was made this way, by the one who loves me most.
Let’s all embrace who we are, and stop saying sorry.
To doors, because they don’t have feelings.
And, the rest of the world too.
You don’t have to apologize for who you are.