There’s a place I sometimes go that is not good for me. Where I am not my best, where I do not shine. This place causes me to retreat and withdrawal.
It’s a dangerous journey, wandering down a dark and thorny path to the land of “I’m not.” When I’m in this place, I start to devalue myself and I spiral into a season of insecurity and doubt. It’s not a place where I thrive or live out who and what I am called to be.
Yet I go there.
I’ve spent so much time in “I’m not” land that I might as well buy a house and move in. Maybe you’ve visited this place too?
If you haven’t, I’ll give you a personal tour –
Wake up. Have a coffee. Breathe. Start looking around and start being really hard on yourself and super negative. Compare yourself to others continually (social media is especially good for this), and then think about all the things you haven’t accomplished in your life, and how everyone is doing so much better than you.
Soon, the “I’m not” vibe takes over.
I’m not smart enough
I’m not young enough
I’m not attractive enough
I’m not talented enough
I’m not thin enough
I’m not liked enough
I’m not recognized enough
I’m not valued enough
I’m not enough.
Sounds like a great place to live, right?
Nope. I actually hate “I’m not” land. It’s grey, there’s no sunshine or rainbows. You don’t watch beautiful sunsets and laugh until your stomach hurts. You don’t live with inspiration and calling. You don’t make a difference and encourage those around you. Instead you are robbed of joy, spend your time wishing the days away, and your purpose slowly starts to fade.
When you focus on what you are not, you forget who you are meant to be.
Not comes easy. Not is our default. Not gives us an excuse.
The lie of “I’m not” robs us of the truth of who we are.
I don’t want to live in the shadow of what I am not.
I want to live in the light of who I am.
I ask myself – Who am I?
I start to declare truth, because truth crushes the lies.
I am a child of God
I am loved
I am valued
I am called
I am gifted
I am precious
I am chosen
The land of “I am” brings more life than the land of “I’m not.” My Maker, the great I AM, is writing His story through my life. Through your life. We can change the tone of the narrative, live and be all that He has said we are.
If He IS, then I AM.
If He IS, then YOU are.
I’m shutting down the dark places, throwing away the key to the land of “I’m not”. I refuse to live there. Instead, I’m moving into a place where I am training my thoughts and holding them captive to His. Seeking out marvelous, extravagant, life-giving words and shouting them over the story of my life that He and I are writing together. To live life with purpose and love. Not about me at all, but about Him.
Fresh blank chapters ahead, with beautiful stories of His love and goodness.
Forgetting what I am not,
Living out what I am.