I was at a gathering this week and after it was over, I realized that in the span of no more than 10 minutes, I had dished out exactly 8 or 9 really awkward hugs. I have written about my awkwardness before in The Awkward is Real. but this was a whole new level. I just couldn’t stop hugging people. People that maybe didn’t want a hug, but I hugged them anyway. Now that I’ve started this hugging, I’m afraid I might not be able to stop. If you have an aversion to hugs, you might want to stay clear of me until I sort this all out. It’s like I see a familiar person and my arms just flail out in a wide spread.
Come to Mama, give me a big old hug!
After being in a room full of people which led to this impulsive hugging, I realized that I have led a very secluded life this summer. You know how the turtle pulls itself into it’s shell? That’s been me. This has been my “season of alone.” I’ve pulled myself so far into the shell that you can only see my eyeballs peeking out. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve left the house for groceries. I’ve had the best family time with my kids. I’ve had patio dates with my husband. I’ve been committed to work.
And…that’s about it.
I’ve been very much by myself.
Alone, but not lonely.
I’ll be honest, it worried me a little at times. Am I turning into a hermit? Is it ok to be so inward? Is the fact that I haven’t hosted a BBQ all summer, or been able to write, or make plans with friends – is that ok? Is introversion my new superpower? Am I depressed? Is there something wrong with me? Do I need medication? Can you hide away and still live life?
This week it finally came to me, and I understood what it’s been all about.
The other theme of my life. Deep, altering life change in a number of areas. It all started to make sense, I’ve been processing change in my season of alone. Some process change by sharing and talking. I apparently, do the complete opposite. And, it’s ok.
Here’s what I’ve learned:
- I’m never really alone
- Alone places are quiet places
- Quiet places are God places
- God places are where we need to be in change
- It’s ok to have a season of alone with Him
- I can’t stay in the season of alone forever
The good thing about seasons are that they don’t stay the same. They are ever evolving, and fluid. When one ends, another begins.
What you are in one season, can change in the next.
What you don’t understand in one season, can be made clear when you look back.
If you are in a season of alone, remember that a new season is coming. When it starts to stir, and you are ready to move on – GO! Jump in. Don’t hesitate. Look for the opposite of where you have been. Embrace a season of community, move into a focus of together, look at what is ahead. Call those friends, plans those BBQ’s and get out there.
Remember what God did in your alone places, and take that into your connected places.
Maybe that new season will begin with an awkward hug.
Go with it.
No matter the season.
You’re never alone.
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens